Becoming TRUE Spiritual Community (2)

     Larry Crabb says that spiritual community is a miracle. 


Humanly speaking, it cannot be created. Unless the hearts of all are broken before the Lord and they look up to Christ (worship) it will not take place. Just making small groups won ’t guarantee that this will happen. Love is having concern for and relationship with your fellow man. For this to happen, it is necessary to listen carefully to what the other is saying. One of the reasons for the failure of small groups is certain persons controlling the conversation and only talking about their own things. According to Paul J. Donoghue and Mary E. Siegel, authors of Are You Really Listening? Key to Successful Communication, active listening is not a luxury, it is a necessity. Love is giving attention to the other. There are four things that prevent active listening:

     (1.) Defending
     (2.) “Me, too” identifying (and it becomes more about the   
            listener than the speaker)
     (3.) Giving advice
     (4.) Judging the speaker

    Unless we “humbly think of others as being better than ourselves (Philippians 2:3) a competitive spirit will occur. It will simply turn into a boastful account of our achievements (or ministry). Or, it will simply degenerate into an atmosphere of judging our fellow man, or looking down on him or preaching to him. Unless it is a safe place, people cannot feel free to be honest. All of us fear being honest with others and if we sense that the atmosphere is dangerous we will clam up. Therefore, respect for our fellow man is absolutely necessary. For example, even with the best of motives, if one person monopolizes the conversation, we truly can’t call it a sharing moment. 


That is because “each one” is an essential part of the spiritual community. Larry says that spiritual community is so rare that people tend to depend on a professional counselor. Conversely, Larry is seeing that when spiritual community works it is not necessary to pay money and go to a counselor. But, if the group is just a “feel good” experience the human element takes precedence and there is the danger of winking at each other’s shortcomings and not being truly accountable to one other. If we don’t come before Christ, there is the danger of overlooking the sins of our fellow man. Then, we fail to have the “speaking the truth in love” relationship that is necessary. Or, if we are not careful, there is the possibility that the group will turn into nothing but a gathering to pour out our criticism of others, or the church - just a place to lick our wounds. Therefore, a spiritual community is a miracle. But, according to Larry, it is a worthwhile thing to strive for.  

    “It’s time to build the church, a community of people who take refuge in God and encourage each other never flee to another source of help, a community of folks who know the only way to live in this world is to focus on the spiritual life – our life with God and others. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it. Our impact on the world is at stake.” (p.20) ———————　
Looking forward to your comments! asktmc@gmail.com  (Kurihara)